Strong growth forecast in 'rich prick' sector

Two rich pricks, yesterday

Although the entire country has been enjoying the benefits of the of the recent economic boom, nowhere is the feelgood factor more evident than in the evergrowing population of rich pricks. As the economy continues to seemingly create wealth out of nowhere, more and more talentless, lucky assholes are becoming phenomenally well-off without actually doing anything to deserve it. And economists say the trend can only continue.

"What with the present confidence in the market and the very high rate of overseas investment in the country, I think we'll be seeing this sector of the economy grow and grow in the next few years," comments business analyst Robert Browne.

"In the present climate, a lot of people seem to just assume that they have a divine right to get very rich for doing very little work. If you pay a visit to any third-level college around the country you will see thousands of obnoxious little fuckers who are looking forward to a long career of pushing people around and ignoring anyone not as rich as they are."

Far from discouraging these young people from the rapid, ruthless accumulation of wealth, it seems that the recent financial scandals involving politicians have only acted as inspiration, revealing previously ways of being venal, amoral cheats that had never even been thought of.

"I thought I was callous and greedy before i heard about all this Ansbacher stuff, and all that business with the bribes," says Economics student Bernard Timmons, "But those guys had it down to a fine art. CJ is my idol."


Home    Back Issues    Story Archives    About