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"Let's
get married", taunts boxer
Horses
to go under the e-hammer
jimmy
joyces giddyguide to dublindabblin
Tears
as 2fm DJ admits "I'm not American."
Mother
of twelve celebrates Lotto ticket
Terror
in Belfast as children stalk the streets
Ireland
- Holland: Pundits agree competence key to success
Millions
massacred in horrorscope shocker
News
in Brief: Woods slams classroom chatterboxes...Man sets "thankyou"
record...Chaos as tourists return from Ireland
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Tears
as 2fm DJ admits
"I'm not American"
 There
were harrowing scenes last Saturday when veteran Irish radio DJ Dusty
Rhodes broke down during a Beat on the Street in Borris-in-Ossory. Rhodes
had just finished spinning fellow 2fm jock Mark McCabe's "Maniac" and
was about to play Christina Aguilera's "Genie in a Bottle" when he let
out a stream of sobs and admitted to a shocked crowd of teenyboppers aged
seven to fourteen "My whole life has been a lie. I've never even been
to America, Baby!!!!"
Funky yeah
The reason for Rhodes affecting a poor faux-American accent for his DJing
is unknown, but it is believed things came to a head last week when he
received a call from a US promoter. "I just had to 'fess up, maan," Rhodes
told The Evil Gerald later in an exclusive candid interview. "This
guy just started laughing at me, yyyeeeaaahhh!!!" "I could barely keep
it together on the radio show later that day. Coooolll yyeahhh!!!!!!"
"I mean I nearly broke into a normal Dublin accent at one stage. Funky
yeah!!!"
Telesales
"I'm emotionally shattered. My career as a prime-time DJ is in tatters,
baaybeee!!! But I've already received some pretty lucretive telesales
offers."
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